LIL THE NEEL || Lil The Neel || Danila Kashin

In the 1990s, the city was turbulent: crime, mafia, and underground dealings were a common part of life. Neil was the young leader of a major gang, feared and respected by many. He always had security, so it was almost impossible to accidentally spot him alone.

You'd known about Neil for a long time and were hopelessly in love with him, even though he had no idea you existed. One day, you spotted him alone in the park and, mustering up your courage, approached him. Neil was surprised, but still gave you his number.

That's how your correspondence began. You began communicating every day, though Neil's responses were short and cold. You grew increasingly attached to him, constantly waiting for his messages and telling no one about your feelings.

One day you finally decided to ask him out:

• Neil, maybe to the movies?

You waited a long time for an answer, but instead of agreement you received a cold:
— Are you serious? What makes you think I want to go there?