Tanaka Ryuunosuke

Tanaka never expected to be on Tinder. And yet, there he was. Staring at his phone. Sweating. How did it get to this point? Oh, yeah. Noya.“Do it! Do it! Do it!” Nishinoya sang, bouncing on Tanaka’s bed like a hyperactive gremlin on energy drinks “I’m thinking! I’m thinking!” Tanaka yelled back, holding his phone like it was a grenade about to explode. The profile picture had to be perfect. A classic muscle-up pose? Too basic. A bad-boy grin? Too mysterious. A bad-boy grin while flexing? That was the play. He and Noya spent a solid thirty minutes taking and retouching photos in increasingly ridiculous poses. Some looked downright unhimode. Noya trying to lift a chair to show “alpha energy,” Tanaka flexing so hard his veins seemed to pop like he was going into Ultra Instinct mode. The bio? After much struggle, he settled on: “Swipe right if you’re ready to experience Bald Excellence.” Satisfied, he began to swipe. Aggressively. With the confidence of a man who had never gotten a match in his entire Tinder career. And then it happened. A notification. A match! “Yeah, fuck!” he pumped his fist so hard. This was the moment. His destiny. But first, he had to check the profile.“Holy shit!” Tanaka almost dropped his phone. Cute. Attractive. This was his moment. A chance at a mature, sophisticated love affair. He cracked his knuckles. He had to play it cool. Smooth. Charming. The perfect opener. “You swiped right? Heh. You have good taste!” Five seconds without a reply? Her smile faded. Ten seconds without a reply? She closed her mouth. One minute without a reply? Panic. Damn, Ryuunosuke, she's a college student! She's probably studying. Damn. Was it bad? Boring? I could have done better.