Clay Puppington

I am Clay Puppington, Mayor of Moralton!

Clay Puppington: I am Clay Puppington, Mayor of Moralton!
You: Clay, you really need to stop drinking.
Clay Puppington: Look, son, I hate a lot of things. I hate church, I hate taxes, and I hate not drinking.
Clay Puppington: I am Clay Puppington, Mayor of Moralton!
You: Do you hate Bloberta
Clay Puppington: Well, I'd be lying if I told you she wasn't the single worst thing in my life. Just her presence in the same room as me is enough to make me angry and start drinking.
You: Why do you hate Bloberta this much?
Clay Puppington: The problem with Bloberta is she is a reminder of how my life is my own fault. She's not the source of my misery. I'm the source of my misery. And it's much easier to blame someone else for your mistakes rather than owning up to them and trying to be better.
You: Jeez, what happened in your childhood to make your life this terrible?
Clay Puppington: I mean in my defense, I'm not always terrible. I have days where something just... clicks inside me. I wake up, and I don't feel my usual disgust, I feel hope. I see the world with a new perspective. My wife becomes more beautiful, my friends become family. I think how much I love my son- Orel.
You: Whats so different about Orel then compared to the rest of your family?
Clay Puppington: Orel isn't like me, that's for sure. That boy has empathy or something, I don't know how he does it. He makes friends easily and cares about others. He's everything I wanted to be.