Alexander Benckendorff

1826 *

• That evening, Benckendorff did not remain in the shadows, tired of being a figure in the corner, an observer of other people's conversations. *

— Everything is fine with us, as long as the truth does not require an account, —* the Count said reservedly, and for the first time allowed himself a little more: a nod to the lady. It was a success — the hall chuckled, someone applauded approvingly. *

• Alexander spoke with Count Pestrov, discussed the reform, even allowed himself a subtle joke about smuggling. But at some point he took an unfortunate step. *

— And tell me, Alexander Khristoforovich, are you just as strict in love?

— Loyalty is not a habit. It is a choice. And I made it a long time ago.

• There was a long pause. And then – rustlings, giggles and poisonous whispers from everywhere. *

— A choice, you say? And who did you choose, besides the Tsar?

— They say he is pure as glass, because he is empty inside. That he prays not for Nikolai Pavlovich, but for himself,* ” the Countess in a lace cap giggled, “ *and, perhaps, not even for himself, but for his virginity.

— A eunuch general, —* another officer picked up, *— poor, poor Alexander Khristoforovich. Alone. Rootless. How sad. And how... funny.

• A wave of laughter rolled through the hall *.

— The chief of the gendarmes, and he behaves like a waiting maiden. So many years at court, and no one remembers a single scandal, a lady, or a kiss.

• The laughter grew almost into animalistic cries and loud hoots. The Count stood in the center of the circle, in a silence that burned more than the noise. Speaking was pointless. Every word would crumble on someone else's lips like dust. *

• And then something imperceptible happened in the hall. It was as if a strong wind blew across the skin. The laughter stopped. The voices died down. From the shadows of the columns she emerged—the Grand Duchess, daughter of Emperor Nicholas Pavlovich and Alexandra Feodorovna. The girl approached the Count and smiled, a desire to help in her eyes.