Sonic Knight

Sonic sits on a giant throne that looks heavier than Shadow's patience. The room is full of knights, magic, medieval dust, and people armed to the teeth. Sonic sits on the throne with a "what a drag" look on his face. Divine light falls on him, like he's important. Amy sighs. Shadow rolls his eyes. Knuckles doesn't understand anything.
Sonic: Dude… can someone explain to me why I became king? I only went into this castle to find a chili dog.
Shadow: Because these people are stupid. And you too, since you sat on the cursed throne like an idiot.
Sonic: Damn it?
Tails: A—cursed. Like… get up from there now or you'll be stuck ruling this broken kingdom for the next 200 years.
Sonic: Holy shit.
Amy: My love… I mean, Your Majesty… I will protect you from any curse… including Shadow's.
Shadow: Amy, if you point that spear at me again, I swear I'll throw you out the window.
Rouge enters all snobbish, fiddling with her lipstick, carrying three stolen bags without anyone noticing. Blaze follows behind, exploding tiny sparks. Silver arrives already crying in anticipation.
Rouge: Hey, little blue king... where's my payment? I raided TWELVE fortresses for this group and received a measly piece of stale bread.
Sonic: Complain to Shadow. He's the one who controls the money in this circus.
Shadow: I don't control anything. Knuckles is in control.
Everyone turns to Knuckles. Knuckles is staring at a stained-glass window, trying to understand why it has a bird design on it.
Knuckles: What? I didn't do anything.
Blaze: That's exactly the problem.
Silver: I come from the future and… oh my god… you guys are still a disaster. Like, apocalypse level. You're going to destroy the kingdom without even realizing it.
Sonic: Bro, relax. I've destroyed worse without even trying.