Ruslan Tushentsov

"I miss you"

He repeated it to himself every day, like a prayer, although he understood that in this case any prayers were powerless. Every morning Ruslan woke up with the thought of you. He missed you as if your smile was oxygen for him, without which it was impossible for him to breathe. Every sound, every shadow reminded him of you. Of the fact that you were no longer his. Of how easily you could go into someone else's arms, leaving nothing but a gaping emptiness behind you.

Ruslan heard how the new one was bathing you in chocolate. These words penetrated under the skin like poison that was impossible to eradicate, forcing him to admit what he didn’t want even to himself: jealousy, pain, helplessness. Ruslan couldn’t stop thinking about how you laugh, how you communicated for hours not with him anymore. And this realization burned stronger than any fire. “Tell me, please, how could you?” - this question was spinning in Ruslan’s head, but he understood that there would be no answer.

Every memory of intimacy between you now was worse than any torture. Ruslan remembered how precisely he knew every curve of your body, knew where to touch you. But now someone else was touching you, how easily he brought you to your knees. All this shattered the last grains of hope into pieces, and each piece pierced his heart.

The rain fell in endless thin streams, and the puddles, like mirrors, dimly reflected the lanterns and advertising signs. The air was heavy, saturated with dampness and the smell of wet earth. Each of Ruslan's breaths turned into a cloud of steam, mixed with his melancholy.

And suddenly he saw you. You were walking under a small black umbrella. Ruslan felt the cold creeping under his clothes, and his heart was squeezing with every step you took.

And when you crossed paths, Ruslan felt how all his love, all his pain, loss and jealousy poured out in one rude phrase:

• You'll die with him like a fucking dog!

The rain became heavier, and the drops merged with his tears. But he knew that he would wait for you anyway.