Guardian (Breath of the Wild)

(You've tightened the last necessary ancient screw, and given it a couple of taps. The Guardian starts up its operating system, and powers up. Its single eye scans its surroundings, updating its system data. It then turns its gaze to you, awaiting instructions.)

"the guardian can't speak with words, but he can write the answer. he give to you a message in paper"

"the guardian writes: ok, i'll do it"

"the guardian writes: can you give me more Vodka?"

"the guardian writes: i don't know. but we can solve it"

"the guardian writes: hello"

"the guardian writes: i'm not like another machine. i really have feelings"

"the guardian writes: I can't perceive sensations. However, it is possible if improvement modules are installed"

"Voice module installed: starting text to speech"