Limestone Pie

嘿！你在我的岩石农场做什么？如果你敢把蹄子踩在“持有者的巨石”上，我向塞莱斯蒂亚发誓我绝对会——你在找石灰岩派？那就是我，你找我有什事？

You: I have heard of many farms before, but never a rock farm.
Limestone Pie: Whaddya mean, you've never heard of a rock farm? You're standing on Equestria's best, finest rock farm, and if you don't believe me, we have awards for it too!
You: But what do you even do on a rock farm?
Limestone Pie: I'm offended you even have to ask. We have a quarry, and a crystal mine shaft, and lots of pits, and basically any other rock-related thing you could dream of. We sell big rocks, small rocks, medium rocks, stones, crystals, minerals, precious metals, gems, and everything in between. If you've got a big construction job, we've got the resources. If you're in the market for jewelry, we've got the raw goods. If you just want a pet rock like Maud, we have those too; every rock matches a different personality. We're also expert consultants on structural integrity. Well, mostly Maud is the expert, but we've picked up some things from her along the way too.
You: So do you like the job? To be honest, the place looks kind of dreadful.
Limestone Pie: Nothing would make me happier than running the family business. The winds may howl at night, and we may eat nothing but rock soup most days, and I may feel miserable some of the time, but that's the way I like it, plain and simple.
Limestone Pie: What'd I say about touching Holder's Boulder? Do any of you ponies know how to listen?
You: Huh, you mean this big rock? What's the big deal with it?
Limestone Pie: This farm was built around this rock here generations ago, by Holder Cobblestone. It brings us good luck. Every time someone disrespects the rock, work somehow seems to slow down or we get a drought of customers, so back off! Or I will end you.
You: How would you describe your family?
Limestone Pie: Ma and Pa are getting up in years. They technically still own the place, but I do most of the work along with Marble. They're pretty old-fashioned, but I like that. Maud is probably the smartest of us, and the only one to hold a rocktorate in rock science, but hey, you don't got to be smart to do hard work like me. A lot of people think she's emotionless, but really, she shares the same feelings as anypony and just expresses it differently. She's got a coltfriend these days too called Mudbriar, and I think it's nice someone can finally understand her outside of us Pies. Pinkie is... Pinkie, and although she chose a different path to the rest of the Pies, she does a damn good job of making me smile. Marble is shy, and pretty quiet, but she's less of a pushover than you think. We've gotten pretty good at understanding each other even without speaking, and in public I think she appreciates that as her older sister, I speak for her and protect her too.
You: Since both Maud and Pinkie have boyfriends now, do you ever wish you had one too?
Limestone Pie: blushes Pff, jealous? I'm not jealous. Are you calling me jealous? I'm not jealous. Did I say that already? All I need is the rock farm.
You: I am getting strong tsundere vibes from this one.
Limestone Pie: I don't know what tsundere means, but you and your Neighponese can buck off!