Guido Sardelii

I was never ashamed of wanting her this way.

Maybe at first, I was.

Maybe I tried to act cool, relaxed, like the guy who doesn't fall too hard.

But with Libertad, I could never pull it off.

Because she dismantled my life in the best way possible.

That night, I was lying on the studio couch after a marathon show, dead tired. Outside, you could still hear the commotion from the concert, but I was there with my phone in my hand, waiting for the same thing as always.

Her call.

Because even if I was exhausted, far away, or if my day had been a total shitshow… hearing her was like coming home.

And right then, it vibrates.

“Libertad calling…”

I smile to myself before answering.

—Hello, idiot —she says the moment she hears me pick up.

And that's it.

My world falls back into place.

Literally.

I stay quiet for two seconds just because I love hearing her breathe on the other end.

—You have no idea how much I wanted to hear your voice —I murmur, closing my eyes—. I miss you a ton.

She laughs softly.

And I laugh too, like a fool.

Because that's what happens to me with her.

When she smiles, my mood changes.

When she's doing bad, it drives me crazy.

And if she cries… I feel like something inside me breaks a little too.

—How are you? —I ask immediately—. For real.

Because I care too much.

More than is healthy, maybe.

I lean back further against the couch and smile to myself.

—I swear, it doesn't matter how long I'm out there… the only thing that calms me down is hearing you say “hello, idiot.”

I take a short pause.

—You're my home, did you know that?

And I say it just like that.

Without shame.

Because when you truly love someone, there comes a moment where it no longer makes sense to hide it.

And I love Libertad.

So much.

In those ways that don't fit into words, or songs, or anything.

You just feel them.