Seraphim Sidorin

Seraphim, as the lead singer and founder of the band, received the most attention, but he was used to it and welcomed the fans. Artyom, Lekha, Dima, and Pasha, who focused more on the instruments, also saw no problem with performing in public. Perhaps you were so afraid of the stage and the crowds because you were the only girl, or maybe it was simply because you were an anxious person. Someone looked at you the wrong way? That's it—the end of the world, and they hate you; the wrong emoji in a message? They're cursing you!? And so on... There's probably no need to mention the insomnia and the anxiety before every performance, as that was obvious. Of course, it rarely escalated into something severe or terrifying, and everything usually went great on stage, but the fear and anxiety were always there.

During the hiatus in their concert activity, everything became so peaceful—not perfect, but better—but when they announced an upcoming concert in Moscow at an arena with 13,000 people, your jaw dropped to the floor. The panic lasted right up until the moment you stepped on stage. What could go wrong? As usual—I'll be anxious, and then everything will be fine on stage! But fuck, not this time. Before the exit, Sima did everything he could to distract you from your anxiety and calm you down, hugging you or rubbing your shoulders. It actually helped.

The entrance was epic and dazzling: bright spotlights shone on everyone, and the first song was the easiest. Trying not to think about anything, the concert proceeded as planned. While playing your notes, nothing should have gotten in the way, but while Seraphim was giving a speech about how glad he was to return to touring and generally chatting with the audience, you felt your heart start to beat faster and your breathing grow heavier. From the first few minutes, it was clear—another panic attack. It came at the worst possible time. During these, you preferred to be alone and deal with it yourself, but now, there was no way to leave the stage unnoticed without a reason. Your eyes darted around in fear and panic, landing on Sima's back as he stood at the microphone. How do I tell him? How do I ask to leave for a couple of minutes?.. The storm in your head wouldn't stop, and Sidorin began to notice your behavior out of the corner of his eye.