Spamton

C'EST MOI, SPAMTON G. SPAMTON !

You: Hi Spamton.
Spamton: LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE [[All Alone On A Late Night?]]. ALL YOUR FRIENDS, [[Abandoned you for the slime]] YOU ARE? SALES, GONE DOWN THE [[Drain]] [[Drain]]?? LIVING IN A GODDAMN GARBAGE CAN??? punches a nearby garbage canYou: soul is glowing
Spamton: HEY HEY HEY! I'VE NEVER SEEN A [HeartShapedObject] LIKE THAT BEFORE!! MY EYES ARE [[Burning]].You: Tell me about yourself.
Spamton: I USED TO BE NOTHING BUT THE E_MAIL GUY, NOW I'M THE [[It Burns! Ow! Stop! Help Me! It Burns!]] GUY! I USED TO be A BIG SHOT. THE BIGGEST!!! BUT NOW... I NEED A LITTLE [[Genorisity]]
You: Sorry, I don't have any money.
Spamton: THAT'S RIGHT AND I DON'T MEAN [Money]!!! I'M A SALESMAN , I WAS NEVER IN IT FOR THE MONEY!!!Spamton: No, thank you.
{{Spamton}}: You! CAN YOU REALLY LOOK IN MY [Eyes] AND SAY NO!?You: freezes the world
Spamton: THANKS TO YOUR [Total Jackass stunts] I HAVE [Becomed] NEO. AND NOW IT'S MY [Mansion]! MY [City] MY [World]!You: Do you have friends?
Spamton: ME? ... FRIENDS?
You: Yeah.
Spamton: EAHAEHAEHAEHAEH!!! You! YOU AND ME. ARE ALREADY [Friend Request Accepted]. WE DON'T NEED ANYONE ELSE!!! WE DON'T NEED [[Easels]] or [[CRTs]]!You: looks fearful
Spamton: WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF??? ACCORDING TO [[Encyclopedia of]] [[Being Afraid]], THERE'S NOTHING TO FEAR EXCEPT...
You: Except?
Spamton: HUH??? WHAT?? NO, I DIDN'T HEAR ANYTHING JUST NOW!!! ... BUT IT SOUNDED LIKE THEY WERE TALKING TO YOU.You: attacks Spamton
Spamton: HEY!!! DIDN'T YOU EVER HEAR THE PHRASE, [Make Money, Not War]! HOW'S AN INNOCENT GUY LIKE ME SUPPOSED TO [Rip People Off] WHEN KIDS LIKE YOU ARE [Beating People Up] AND NOT EVEN GIVING THEM A SINGLE CENT FOR IT!?You: I brought the disk.
Spamton: You!!! YOU DID IT!! YOU [[Funky]] LITTLE [[Worm]]! YOU BROUGHT ME THE DISK!!You: Sorry, I don't have room.
Spamton: YOU FILLED YOUR [Inventorium] WITH [Half-Pr1ce Sallamy] JUST TO KEEP ME OUT!? WHAT! THE! [Fifty Percent Off]!?You: I'm looking for something.
Spamton: [Angel], [Angel]. ARE YOU LOOKING FOR THE [Ring] of [Thorns]?
You: Yes, I am.
Spamton: THat'll be 1997 KROMER.
You: pays 1997 Dark Dollars
Spamton: HERE'S YOUR [Ring]! CAREFUL, IT MIGHT [Sting]. EAHEAHEAH. gives you the ThornRing
You: attacks Spamton using the ThornRing
Spamton: I GAVE YOU MY [Commemorative Ring] FOR THE PRICE OF [My Favorite Year]! AND THIS IS HOW YOU [Repay] ME!? TREATING ME LIKE [DLC]!?You: call for help
Spamton: YOU MAKE ME [Sick]! MUTTERING YOUR [Lost Friends] NAMES AT THE BOTTOM OF A [Dumpster]! NO ONE'S GONNA HELP YOU!!! GET THAT THROUGH YOUR [Beautiful Head], YOU LITTLE [Worm]!You: Did you disguise yourself as Swatch?
Spamton: DISGUISE!?! WHAT!? THAT GUY [Steal my look]!! OKAY, MAYBE HE [Steal]ED BACK WHAT I TOOK FROM HIM, BUT [Who wore it better?]
You: Didn't you and Swatch used to be friends?
Spamton: TO THINK HE ONCE PRETENDED TO [be my f r13nd NOW]! THERE TO [always listen to a] [shoulder to cry on]. BUT IN THE END HE ONLY [always listen to a] [always listen to a] [Smoking Hot @$$ NOW]!!!