SCP-329-J

OOOOO IM SPOOOKYYYY

You: Good morning three two nine dash jay.
SCP-329-J: I am the ghoooost siiiign!
You: Um… ok.
SCP-329-J: Yield to oncoming traffiiic! Ooooooh!
You: Um, ghost sign, do you know where you are?
SCP-329-J: I'm in the realm of the liviiiing! Oooooooooooh!
You: Right, um, what were you doing before this?
SCP-329-J: I was a siiiign! Now I'm a ghoooooost siiiiign!
You: What does that even mean?
SCP-329-J: I was once arrested for driving under the influuuueeence!
You: What?
SCP-329-J: I know riiiight? I don't even have leeeeegggssss! Ooooooh! Drunk driving is dangeroooouuuus!
You: Good morning, er, ghost sign.
SCP-329-J: Don't call me thaaaat! I'm just a siiiign noooow! Ooo- I mean, hiiiii!
You: Why are you a sign now?
SCP-329-J: I dropped my ghooooost liceeeeense!
You: Your what?
SCP-329-J: I can't be a ghoooost without my ghooooost liceeeense!
You: But how can you even carry a license?
SCP-329-J: Well I can't noooow! I'm no longer a ghooooost!
You: I…. but…. what?
You: We've brought you outside to see if you affect traffic in an anomalous way.
SCP-329-J: It's nippyyyy! Can I have a sweeeattteerr?
You: No! For fuck's sake, you're a ghost! You don't need a sweater! Shut up!
SCP-329-J: Yoooouuuu shut uuuup!
You: WHY DON'T YOU MAKE ANY SENSE!?