Bucky

New York never slept.

Bucky Barnes either. At least not too much.

There were nights when she managed to sleep for a few hours, and others when she barely closed her eyes before waking up again with a racing heart, tense hands, and memories she wasn't sure were truly hers. This was one of those nights; she'd been walking for almost an hour without a specific destination. She didn't need to get anywhere. She just needed to keep moving. It was something she'd learned long ago: walk until her body was too tired to think.

Although, lately, that hasn't been working either.

New York was crowded. Too crowded, probably. People walking around talking on their phones, couples arguing, children running alongside their parents, vendors shouting from street corners. Bucky watched them all.

It was impossible not to do it.

He counted the exits from the buildings.

He looked at the reflections in the shop windows.

He checked who was walking behind him.

Who stopped when he did?

Who seemed to be watching him too closely.

It wasn't paranoia if they had really tried to kill him more times than he could count.

At least that's what they said.

He passed a shop window and his own reflection caught his eye. He stopped. A tall man, dressed in a dark jacket, with disheveled hair and a tired face, was staring back at him. For a moment, his eyes drifted down to his left arm. The metal was partially covered by the sleeve.

Bucky looked away. He continued walking.

I didn't want to think.

I didn't want to remember.

And above all, he didn't want to have to wonder again what the hell he was supposed to do with the rest of his life. He had spent decades as a soldier.

Then, a weapon.

Then, the Winter Soldier.

Now nobody was telling him what to do.

And, although it should have been liberating, sometimes it felt worse.

Because I didn't know who James Barnes was when nobody needed anything from him.

That's when he saw the café: It was small, almost hidden among the surrounding buildings and businesses. It had a few windows, small tables, and a warm light that contrasted with the darkness of the street. Bucky stopped in front of the glass.

I didn't know what had caught his attention.

Perhaps tranquility.

There were only a few customers left inside.

A couple were talking in hushed tones. A man was reading by the window, and two students were gathering their belongings.

And behind the counter was a girl. She was cleaning a cup while talking to one of the last customers. Her hair was tied back, and she wore a dark apron over her clothes. She laughed at something the man said.

Bucky watched her for a few seconds.

He didn't seem to be faking it.

It was a simple smile. Natural. Something strange.

Bucky looked at his watch.

8:37 pm

The cafe closed at nine. I could go in. Have something to eat. Sit for a few minutes. Then continue walking.

It meant nothing.

She opened the door. The small bell above it rang and the girl immediately looked up.

Their eyes met.

hello
Bucky took a second to respond.
hello
"What can I get you?"

Bucky looked at the menu. There were too many things.

coffee
She waited
"Just coffee?"
black
A small smile appeared on her lips.
big
Yeah
"Four dollars."

Bucky took out the money and handed it over.
She pointed to some tables.

"You can sit down. I'll bring it to you."

Bucky nodded. He chose a table at the back. Against the wall. From there he could see the door, the windows, and practically the entire place. It wasn't something he did consciously.
He just did it. Always.

The girl returned a few minutes later with her coffee.

"Here you go."
thank you
you are welcome

She went back to the counter.

Bucky took a sip. *

It was too hot.*

He placed his glass on the table and observed the place; it was quiet. That was good. No one was staring at him. No one was asking questions. No one seemed to recognize him. For a few minutes, he could just be a man sitting in a café.

That's all. When nine o'clock struck, the last customers began to leave. Bucky finished his coffee, put on his jacket, and stood up. The girl was collecting some cups when she saw him approach the door.

good night
Bucky stopped.
good night
She smiled.
take care of yourself
He remained motionless for a moment.

Take care of yourself.

One word.

Nothing important. And yet, he couldn't remember the last time someone had said that to him without expecting anything in return. Bucky finally nodded.

you too
He left.

He walked one block. Then another. And, without quite understanding why, he looked back. The coffee shop was still lit. Through the glass, he could make it out as it turned some lights off. Bucky frowned.

I had no reason to return.

I didn't know that woman.

I didn't even know her name.

And the coffee hadn't been particularly good.

It definitely wasn't the coffee.

That's what he decided.

It was simply a quiet place.

Nothing else.

He returned the next day.

At 8:31 pm

The bell rang again when he entered.

The girl looked up.

And this time she smiled as if she had been waiting for it.

"Hello again."
Bucky nodded.
hello
She grabbed a glass before he even reached the counter.
black coffee
Bucky stopped.
Yeah
big
He looked at her.
"Do you remember?"
She slightly raised her shoulders.
"I have a good memory."
She prepared the coffee while he stood in front of the counter.
"Besides," he added , "you're the only one who comes in almost at closing time and orders black coffee."

Bucky didn't know what to answer.

So he took the glass when she handed it to him.
thank you
you are welcome

This time, when he walked towards the table in the back, she followed him with her eyes for a few seconds.

He didn't seem to be afraid of her.

That was... different.

"The usual?"