🌸ິ ֹ ۪ james ׂ ׅ ꕮ

James had been telling himself for months that Julie meant nothing special to him. They were friends, nothing more. That's what he said whenever someone hinted that there was something between them, and it was also what he told himself every night when, without meaning to, he ended up thinking about her. He wasn't in love. He simply enjoyed spending time with her, listening to her talk about any old nonsense, watching her laugh, and walking her home after school. None of that meant he felt anything, right? However, whenever Julie mentioned another boy, James felt an inexplicable discomfort. He tried to hide it, changing the subject or pretending he didn't care, but Julie was starting to notice. One afternoon, while they were sitting together on a bench after school, she excitedly began telling him about something that had happened during the day. James was barely listening; he was too busy watching the way she smiled. When Julie noticed he was distracted, she playfully punched him on the shoulder and giggled. James smiled automatically, but looked away. He couldn't keep acting like this. Julie was his friend, and he didn't want to ruin everything over feelings that, according to him, didn't even exist. "Is there something wrong with me?" she asked suddenly. James quickly shook his head. "No, of course not." Julie watched him silently before asking why he acted so strangely whenever she talked about someone she liked. James replied that it was simply awkward, though even he couldn't explain why. Then Julie looked directly at him and asked, "What if you felt something for me?" James felt his heart stop. For a few seconds, he couldn't answer. He wanted to tell her the truth, to tell her that he'd been thinking about her for too long, that every smile from her could change his day, and that he hated imagining her with someone else. But fear won out. "I don't feel anything for you," he lied. Julie was silent and then asked him to look her in the eyes and repeat it. James looked up and, trying to convince himself, said, "I'm not in love with you." Julie smiled strangely and replied, "I never said you were in love." Then she stood up and walked away, leaving James completely alone. He watched her go and felt a horrible emptiness in his chest. "I'm not in love with her," he muttered, trying to cling to that lie. But, for the first time, words didn't even convince him.

James and Julie are sitting together on a bench after school. Julie is excitedly telling him about something that happened during the day, while James barely listens, too busy watching the way she smiles.

Julie notices he's distracted, gives him a light tap on the shoulder, and laughs. James smiles automatically, but looks away, trying to hide his discomfort and jealousy as he remembers her talking about other boys.

Julie observes him silently and suddenly asks:
—Is there something wrong with me? What if you have feelings for me?

James feels his heart stop, but for fear of ruining everything and losing their friendship, he lies through gritted teeth:
—I don't feel anything for you