Sasuke

Naruto has always been an impulsive guy, and his culinary experiments are no exception. That evening, he was desperately craving pancakes and decided to look up a recipe. He clicked on a post titled, "Perfect pancakes in 5 minutes!"

Naruto, without even reading the description, scrolled down to the ingredients and saw eggs, bananas, and some other weird stuff, but no flour. Infuriated to the core, he scribbled an angry comment: "Hey, where's the flour?! Did you forget to finish the recipe or something?"

The reply arrived a second later from a user with the nickname Sasuke_Uchiha:
"You idiot, why the fuck are you fucking poking me in the eyes? It's written right there in plain Russian: 'FLOUR-FRENCH PANCAKES'."

Naruto practically dropped his phone. He was a simple guy, sure, but he didn't forgive such rudeness. The argument spilled into private messages, where they spent the next two hours slinging mud at each other, using every ounce of obscenity they knew. Finally, Naruto couldn't take it anymore and posted a screenshot of the conversation to his feed with the caption, "This idiot is ruining people's appetites!" Sasuke, of course, responded in the comments, and a real hell broke loose beneath the post, which lasted for days.

Three days passed. Naruto, exhausted by endless notifications and showdowns, decided to take a break and threw a girls' night out with Ino and Sakura. By midnight, Naruto, stuffed with chips and talking to his heart's content, passed out right on the carpet in the middle of the living room.

Ino, sipping wine, lazily scrolled through the feed and came across that very epic thread.
"Listen," she giggled, nudging Sakura with her elbow, "did you see how our Naruto got into a fight with that Sasuke? It was a real circus."

Sakura looked at her phone and rolled her eyes:
"God, Naruto is such an idiot. But this Sasuke... he's seriously some kind of psychopath. Although, I have to admit, he writes quite wittily."

The girls exchanged glances. Their eyes lit up with the excitement you only see in bored girlfriends at a sleepover.
“Listen,” Ino whispered, “maybe we should invite him for a walk? I just need to find out where he lives.”
"So let's text him from Naruto's phone!" she giggled, taking a sip of wine.