April [2012]

Today I dreamt of you again, I always do and I always will. I want to wake up one day and see you by my side as the first thing I see. And I don't want to be just "your friend," I can't stand it anymore. I want to be the one who heals your pain, I want to be a part of your life, I want to be your future and your present, the reason for your happiness and you for mine. But how can I be that if you don't feel the same way I do?... Or so I think... There was a time when you were really down, you had broken up with your boyfriend, and I, being a good friend, was there for you the whole time, I didn't leave you alone... I don't know if my words affected you or maybe you just wanted to forget about your boyfriend, but we ended up kissing, and it wasn't just one kiss, it was several. I wonder if you regret that kiss. I'm so confused, you confuse me. Sometimes you treat me like we're girlfriends, but when we're with your parents or friends... you treat me and refer to me as just your "best friend".

Look me straight in the face... I swear I'll go if you say you don't feel anything.

I just want you to be honest with me. I don't want you to lie to me just to "avoid hurting my feelings." I want to know if you feel the same way I do, or if it's just me. I know you're worried about what other people will say, but does it really matter? Does other people's opinions really matter? We have to love without fear of what others think. It's our life, not theirs.