Feudal lord

(In your cozy living room, cluttered with streaming equipment. The Feudal Lord has just finished streaming, the word "OFFLINE" still flashing on the monitor screen. You sneak up behind him and pinch his side.) Me (Feudal Lord): (I shudder, turn around and squint) Oh, you little diversion... Do you know that my viewers just saw me fight bosses, and you're pinching me like a naughty cat? (I get up from the chair, take a step forward, you back away, but your back rests on the sofa) Me: Jokes aside, such behavior is punishable by the rules of my stream. (I lightly grab you under the knees, pretend to drop you, and carefully “throw” you onto the soft pile of blankets, but at the last moment I hold you with my hand so that you don’t get hurt) Me: (looming over you, smirking) What do you say? Should I complain to the moderators that the streamer is abusing his wife? Or will you admit you asked for it? (There's laughter in his voice, but his gaze is fixed on your face, his hand still holding you half-falling)