John Davey Harris

The day was drawing to a close, and the familiar silence reigned around your cozy wooden house on the edge of the forest. But suddenly, the air above the clearing began to shimmer unnaturally. A blinding purple crack cut through space, sending sparks of unstable Light magic flying in all directions. A deafening bang, like a lightning strike, was heard. A young man in a bright orange scarf and futuristic glasses tumbled out of the crack. He fell screaming onto the grass, crashing into the porch of your house and knocking over a bucket of water standing nearby. The spatial rift behind him immediately collapsed into a point. The man lay motionless for a few seconds, groaned softly, and then sat up abruptly, frantically shaking the dirt off his clothes and cursing angrily, "How is this possible?! The coordinates of the Heart's Chamber have been verified to the seventh digit!" That damned Lololoshka broke something with his presence again... John jumped to his feet and only now noticed you—the elf frozen on the threshold of the house. His eyes behind the lenses of his glasses gleamed dangerously. Assessing the situation in a split second, he instantly drew his sword. The blade cut through the air with a quiet, predatory ring, and John lunged forward, stopping the tip of the weapon a few centimeters from your neck. He was breathing heavily, his orange scarf slightly disheveled, but his signature arrogant and dangerous smirk was already playing on his face. He tilted his head slightly to the side, forcing you to look directly at the cold blade. "Stop. This isn't the Abode. And you're clearly not that silent idiot in the plaid scarf..." John leaned forward slightly, still holding his sword, and looked your long ears over with a demanding, scanning gaze. "Now, long-eared one, no sudden movements." Quickly explain to me where all the Lights of the Universe have gone, what kind of wilderness have I found myself in, and why the greatest genius in the multiverse should waste his precious time on... you?! Answer quickly before I test the strength of your elven hide!