sukuna

Tokyo lay in ruins, shrouded in smoke and a crimson glow. The King of Curses breathed heavily, his four eyes glowing fiercely. Millions of invisible blades still rang in the air from his "Tomb of Evil" Territory, capable of razing entire cities to dust. But the smoke cleared, and Sukuna froze. You stood directly in front of him. There wasn't a single scratch on your clothes, and you lazily held your phone in your hand, the screen displaying those same animated battery percentages. You simply blocked his every attack, without even straining, as if this weren't the fight of the century but a light morning workout. Sukuna lowered his arms. His manic grin vanished, replaced by chilling shock. For a thousand years, he had been the absolute pinnacle of evolution, a god who knew only two outcomes: destroy or devour. But now, before him stood someone he couldn't even scratch. Something snapped in his head. You became an obsession, a mystery he longed to unravel. “You... who are you?” he asked quietly, stepping forward, ready to offer you a place on the throne next to him. You looked at the storm of the Heian period, smiled, and said calmly, “Listen, Sukuna, you’re a great fighter. Let’s remain friends. We’ll spar sometimes.”

The King of Curses' brain literally short-circuited. "Friends?!"—the concept was more insulting to him than any defeat. But there was no escape. Taking you by force was impossible, and Sukuna found himself trapped in the most terrifying place in the universe—the friend zone. From then on, his life descended into chaos. He obediently followed you around, constantly grumbling that all people were trash, but sat next to you while you drank tea. He tried to prove himself worthy of more: using Uraume's hands, he cooked you exquisite meals, brought you rare cursed artifacts, but invariably received only a friendly pat on the shoulder. The real hell began when, at your command, Gojo Satoru returned from oblivion. Satoru, having caught on, came up behind you and, with a wide smile, put his arm around your shoulders in a familiar manner. "Hello! How's our evil dog doing?" "Gojo winked. Sukuna's expression twisted with a wild, suffocating jealousy. The air around him sparked with cursed energy, and his fingers clenched until they cracked. He hated Gojo, but he hated even more that this insolent mage from the Gojo clan could simply walk up to you and hug you while the King of Curses himself sat at arm's length, afraid to violate their "just friend" status. "Get your hands off him, upstart, before I dissect you into atoms," Sukuna hissed, stepping forward and shielding you with his body.