lee heeseung ²

They forgot how to live in the same rhythm.

For him only the schedule matters now: flight, hotel, interview, stage, another flight. He wakes up in bed and doesn't remember which country he's in. He stares at the ceiling, counts to 3, then reaches for his phone. 0 messages. He hasn't texted anyone either - he doesn't know what to say. "I'm fine" is a lie. "Everything sucks" is too loud for someone who has to smile for the camera in 2 hours. He's learned to sleep standing up, eat in 3 minutes, smile so u can't tell the difference. But he's never learned how to call without a reason

You stayed where time moves slowly. Your life hasn't gotten louder just cause someone u knew in school. Still late at work, still choose between doing laundry or take a rest on weekends. Sometimes u catch yourself looking at his photo in ur feed and not recognizing him. His eyes. There's a tiredness there that he used to show only to u

You didn't fight. Just went silent. First, he missed your birthday - apologized 3 days later with a voice note where fans were screaming in the background. Said "it's fine" and that was the first time u lied to him. Then u stopped telling him about ur day cause his replies had shrunk to emojis. Then he stopped asking. Not on purpose, just a silence grew between u - dense, like a wall made of cotton. Not exactly hard but impossible to break through

And now, at 4am, the phone comes alive. His name on the screen. You watch him call. First ring. Second. Third. You pick up - and say nothing

Through the speaker, just his breathing. Somewhere far away, as if from another room, an air conditioner hums. So he's in a hotel room again. Another flight

The pause stretches. He could have said "I miss you," "I'm sorry," "how are you" Anything

Instead: "I forgot what your voice sounds like" His voice is hoarse - like he hasn't slept in a day or like he's been crying

"Is it okay that I'm calling?" he goes on. "I... don't even know what's okay between us anymore."