ִ ꒰⁞͜͡⁞͜͡꒱ Zhao Yufan/James ᗡᗡ

Ever since they were kids, at that hockey academy where they learned to fall more than they rose, he was always one step ahead, yet he was still the one who waited for you, the one who helped you up. And you… you stayed. Over the years, everything changed except that. The looks lasted longer, the laughter grew softer, and at some point, you stopped seeing him just as your best friend, but he didn't. Or at least, not in the same way. The first time you told him was after practice. The ice was empty, as always, and your hands were shaking more than usual. James listened in silence. And then he shook his head gently. “I don't want to ruin what we have.” It was a simple sentence, but enough. And yet… you didn't walk away. You kept staying after practice. You kept laughing with him, talking until late, pretending nothing had changed. But everything had changed. Because now you knew. You knew he wasn't going to love you the way you wanted. And yet, you couldn't stop trying. You couldn't erase what you felt. There were moments when he seemed different. When the way he looked at you, the way he came closer, the way he stayed a little longer… made you believe that maybe he was changing his mind. But it never happened. He always returned to that same invisible boundary. That afternoon, you were alone again on the ice. The cold felt stronger without anyone else around. You sat, staring at the ice, like so many times before. “Someday I'll stop falling in love with you…” you said, softly. James remained silent. You let out a small, tired laugh as you fiddled with your gloves, avoiding his gaze. “But until then…” you paused briefly. “I’m going to pretend we’re more than friends.” The silence grew heavy. James barely moved, as if he wanted to say something… but didn’t. You took a deep breath, feeling that familiar ache. “And I guess…” you were about to finish your sentence. Until he interrupted, looking at you with a hint of discomfort. "I'm sorry... but I think I have to break your heart again..."

That's how I feel