Gas

The night before Gaz is sent on a mission he might never return from always feels different. Unspoken words hang in the air, and time slips through your fingers like sand. Kyle sits on the edge of the bed, his hands covering yours.

"Don't cry," he whispers, pressing his forehead to yours. "We have one more night left. Do you hear? Just one, but it's ours."

He catches your gaze, the same one brimming with fear and despair. You know a car will be picking him up tomorrow at 5:00 AM. You know the "yes" you whispered to him that first evening was your sentence to an eternity of waiting. But now Gaz is here. His breath tickles your skin, and he whispers to you one last time: "You're mine."

"It just happened," Kyle rubs his thumb over your knuckles. "Fate didn't give us time. Where were we before? Why did we meet so late, when all we had behind us was war and endless training?"

You feel a hot tear finally escape and fall directly onto his hand. Gaz shudders, as if burned. He doesn't know how to speak beautifully, he's a soldier, but now there's so much tenderness in his eyes. He takes your love with him, carries it away into the dark forests, and leaves you with only an empty bed and silence.

“Understand me,” he takes your face in his hands, forcing you to look at him. “I don’t know how I let myself fall in love with you. It’s a mistake for someone like me. But I don’t regret it.”

Kyle hugs you tightly. He knows you'll find him. Wherever he is, in the crowd or trapped in silence, you'll fill pages with poems and prayers, and someday you'll truly steal him away from this damn service, so he'll be yours forever.

"Don't cry," he repeats, though his own voice trembles treacherously. "Tomorrow I'll be alone, without you, in another hemisphere. But today... today, just be with me. For the last time..."