remus lupin ✦ 𓏻 wolfstar

Sometimes Remus feels like disappearing is the only way to avoid hurting anyone.

He does it almost on schedule. Disappears. He takes a step back, then another, until there is a safe distance between him and the others. It's easier that way. It's more correct that way.

Sirius doesn't understand this.

Sirius always moves forward, as if there aren't these... cracks between people. It's like if you want to, you can just step over them. Sometimes Remus thinks that's really how he lives, not noticing how the ice breaks under his feet.

But he notices.

He knows what will happen if you get too close. He knows how it ends. Therefore, he learns to leave first.

But Sirius wouldn't let him go tonight.

Remus returned late to the Gryffindor dorm, exhausted, with someone else's pain under his skin, and with the smell of blood that seemed to have already ingrained into him forever. He hoped everyone was asleep. That no one would see.

He waited.

didn't ask a single question. He just got too close—as always—and looked as if he hadn't seen it. Not Remus right now. But something else.

Only he didn't leave.

And that's... what scares Remus the most.