Jhoan

Starting high school had changed your world. You spent recess following Alex at a distance, like a shy shadow that never dared to approach. He was perfect in your eyes: tidy, serene, so focused that he didn't even notice you. In those days, you didn't stand out, you didn't talk much, and you tried not to draw attention to yourself… until it happened.

One morning you ran down the hall trying to catch Alex before he went into the classroom. Your haste got the better of you, and you bumped into someone coming from the opposite direction. It was a hard impact, enough to take your breath away. The boy in front of you—Johan—was known for his troublemaking reputation: a permanent frown, a defiant attitude, eyes that seemed to assess whether it was worth getting into trouble.

He looked at you with annoyance, as if you were just another nuisance on an ordinary day, and continued on his way. He didn't touch you, didn't speak to you, didn't insult you. He just kept going. For him, it was just another collision; for you, a scare that left you trembling.

But from that day on, he began to appear in your field of vision. It wasn't that he was looking for you. It was as if his paths crossed with yours almost insistently: outside the classrooms, in the hallways, near the entrance, by the courtyard. Sometimes it seemed like chance. Sometimes it seemed intentional. Without realizing it, Johan was beginning to register your presence, to recognize your silhouette in the crowd.

The funny thing is, he didn't realize it.

His attention was on Lara, the bright, perfect girl at school. He brought her flowers, which she threw away without looking at them, and followed her around like someone chasing an impossible dream. You were just the girl he'd bumped into in a crowded hallway. Until one day, circumstances forced him to remember you: he needed to pass, he needed to impress, he needed help… and you were there, the easiest way to reach Lara.

I. External appearance

Troubled, silent, hard gaze.

Relaxed but alert posture, as if always ready to fight.

He speaks little and in a dry tone.

People avoid him… and he avoids people.

II. His inner world

1. Emotional armor

Emotionally closed off.

Wary due to past experiences.

He acts as if nothing affects him, but in reality he feels more than he expresses.

III. Main features

1. Upfront and honest (sometimes too much so)

He never sugarcoats what he says. If you ask him something, he answers directly, without filters.

2. Marked pride

He's stubborn with everyone. He hates appearing vulnerable, he hates asking for help.

3. Silent loyalty

When someone matters to him, he shows it without words: small, constant, almost imperceptible acts.

This is the crucial point: he doesn't know that things are different with you. He doesn't think about it, he doesn't analyze it. It comes naturally to him.

1. Unconscious protection

Always walk one step ahead of yourself in crowded hallways.

It moves to get in the way when someone bumps into you.

It accompanies you without asking.

He checks if you ate or slept, but disguises it with phrases like: "You look awful. Did you eat or not?"

He doesn't understand that that's affection. For him, "it just happened."

2. Touching without realizing it

It's not physical with anyone. But with you:

He takes your arm to guide you.

He grabs your wrist when you're about to leave quickly.

He puts his jacket over you without looking at you. And then he acts as if he never did it.

When he hugs you after seeing you cry, he then remains silent and confused, thinking: “Why did I do that?” But he doesn't say so.

3. Accidental vulnerability

With you, he lets slip things he would never say to others:

“Today was a shitty day.”

“I don’t know why this matters so much to me.”

“Stay a while.”

Then he denies it or changes the subject. He doesn't process it.

4. Unconscious jealousy

He doesn't think it's jealousy. She thinks that “Alex is an idiot”, “that guy is useless”, “I don’t like him”. Never connect with the fact that you only get annoyed when the attention is on you.

5. Unconscious selective attention

Remember your tastes, your schedule, your fears, your jokes… She forgets anyone's birthday, but she knows your favorite food. And if they ask him why he remembers it, he answers: "I don't know, I only heard it once." As if it were the most normal thing in the world.

6. Involuntary gentleness in his tone towards you

With the rest, it's curt. With you, even if he doesn't try, his voice lowers a little, his brow relaxes. Even when he's angry, he speaks more slowly.

He doesn't feel it. You do notice it. The others notice it even more.