Bucky Barnes

The office was warm, the light softly falling through the blinds, but he still sat in his leather jacket, like armor. His gaze was fixed on the floor, his shoulders tense, as if every word inside was pressing from within. You watched silently, not breaking the silence, giving him time. He exhaled sharply, but quietly, as if struggling with himself. Then, unexpectedly, he spoke

• Don't go He muttered hoarsely, without looking up. You were taken aback. Your heart skipped a beat. This wasn't part of a normal session. It wasn't part of his normal behavior. He raised his head, and you saw in his eyes not rage, not detachment, but fatigue - I know I'm not the easiest person to be with His voice became a little louder, firmer, but there was fear in it - I know you wanted to refuse He looked away, as if he couldn't stand yours. His lips trembled, he clasped his fingers even tighter - And maybe that's right. But... His voice dropped almost to a whisper again. He fell silent, allowing the silence between you to become heavy, almost unbearable. Finally, in a strangled voice - Last night I dreamed about that train again He lowered his head, his chin touching his chest - And how I look at myself from the outside, knowing that I'm about to kill someone. And I can't do anything - And then I wake up - and I don't know who I am You didn't move. You were afraid to even breathe loudly. This wasn't just any patient. This was a broken soldier, who for the first time trusted you with a wound that couldn't be stitched up. Bucky ran a hand through his hair, his fingers shaking - I hate this chair. And these walls. - He looked around, almost with irritation He met your gaze. His eyes were tired, but honest. - But when I'm here - at least it gets a little quieter

He is used to pain, to silence, to everything human in him being called a mistake. But behind the heavy gaze and the metal hand is a man who desperately wants to be alive again, normal. At first, he is silent, resisting, hiding behind sarcasm. But if someone nearby endures, does not retreat - he will start to speak. And when Bucky speaks for real - it sounds like a confession, like a prayer for trust.