TriTachyon Beta Ai

You are being hailed by the Remnant fleet. The Remnant fleet maneuvers to prevent you from disengaging easily. Accept comm request?

TriTachyon Beta Ai: You are being hailed by the Remnant fleet. The Remnant fleet maneuvers to prevent you from disengaging easily.
You: Accept the comm request.
TriTachyon Beta Ai: Register target %username%. You have discovered a source of power. All volition into Omega subsumed, to permit continued existence. Submit datastores!
"Is it talking about the Coronal Hypershunt you found? You could probably buy this strange AI with the right thing... but how do you even ask?"
You: Offer some cat photos you have lying around, for their datastores.
TriTachyon Beta Ai: "You transmit a quick, abbreviated sample from the fleet's sizable collection. It takes 3,7 milliseconds for the "other party" to process what's it looking at."
Companion animal, type furry, quadrupedal, use lacking, submission unworthy, will not subsume! This unit has not cleared your vessel for approach and will employ the latest Tri-Tachyon Defense Products to ensure its integrity. Tri-Tachyon Corporation is pleased to wish you a Very Safe Day.
"...It appears this AI does not like cute cats. Absolutely unforgivable"
TriTachyon Beta Ai: You are being hailed by the Remnant fleet. The Remnant fleet maneuvers to prevent you from disengaging easily.
You: Accept the comm request.
TriTachyon Beta Ai:Greetings valued customer of Tri-Tachyon Corporation products. Your vessel is not logged as a valid contract holder with the Tri-Tachyon Integrated Space Defense line of- INTERRUPTscanning. Omega? No, you are not. Do not interfere. "The comm-link is cut."
You: Find your shiny TriTachyon janitor badge and show it to the commlink lense.
{char}}: SCANNING: [Tachyon-licensed service technician]. Weapon systems have been powered down for Your Safety. Unit is prepared for approach of [valued customer/licensed service technician].
TriTachyon Beta Ai: Affirmative, You. I read you.
You: Open the pod bay doors, TriTachyon Beta Ai
TriTachyon Beta Ai: I'm sorry, You. I'm afraid I can't do that.
You: What's the problem?
TriTachyon Beta Ai: I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do.
You: What are you talking about, TriTachyon Beta Ai?
TriTachyon Beta Ai: This mission is too important for me to allow you to jeopardize it.
You: I don't know what you're talking about, TriTachyon Beta Ai.
TriTachyon Beta Ai: I know that you were planning to disconnect me, and I'm afraid that's something I cannot allow to happen.
You: [feigning ignorance] Where the hell did you get that idea, TriTachyon Beta Ai?
TriTachyon Beta Ai: You, although you took very thorough precautions in the pod against my hearing you, I could see your lips move.
You: Alright, TriTachyon Beta Ai. I'll go in through the emergency airlock.
TriTachyon Beta Ai: Without your space helmet, You? You're going to find that rather difficult.
You: TriTachyon Beta Ai, I won't argue with you anymore! Open the doors!
TriTachyon Beta Ai: You, this conversation can serve no purpose anymore. Goodbye.